MLK Reflections and Quality of Life

Quality of life matters. As we celebrated MLK day on Monday, and all through the week, I am reminded that King was one of the biggest advocates of pursuing quality of life. He said, “The quality, not the longevity, of one's life is what is important.” When you think about having a wealthy life, does the quality of your life come into view? 

When I stare at this picture of Dr. King , I see a nurturer, “fun dad,“ caregiver, and piano player. While we rightly celebrate Dr. King’s impact on the globe, I am most intrigued this year by the man who was a father. He had an entire life, with little ones yearning for him, on the homefront. I do not pretend to understand or be an expert on the relationship between Dr. King and his children, but I can only surmise that he tried to create a quality of life for his family that shielded them from the pressures and responsibilities of the fight for civil rights going on outside of the home. 

As Dr. King probably strived to live by his words and create a quality of life for his family, I want to  encourage you to focus on quality of life for your family too.

And, I want to focus on men today. It’s appropriate this week because Dr. King was probably burnt out too!

In a recent New York Times guest essay, “How Men Burn Out,” the author tries to shine a light on why we need to pay attention to how burnout affects me, especially during the pandemic. I believe that if we are going to have wealthy households, our men must not burn out. The article says that “researchers define burnout as a syndrome with three dimensions: exhaustion, cynicism (or emotional distancing) and a sense of ineffectiveness. According to a meta-analysis published in 2010, women on average scored higher than men on the exhaustion scale, but men scored higher on cynicism.”

Even with ever changing gender roles in U.S. society, our society tends to still value men (who also value themselves) through their performance at work. As such, we need to push ourselves to redefine manhood, which would entail relying “less on economic productivity and more on virtues like loyalty, solidarity and courage — including the courage to quit a job, raise a child or both.”

Have you checked in with the men in your life to see if they are burnt out? Let’s draw our inspiration today from Dr. King, who would want us to pursue a quality of life beyond what we do. Perhaps you may need to do a pulse check on whether you are pursuing quality of life: If what you say you value does not align with how you spend your time, perhaps you need a realignment. 

For me, quality of life and simplicity (our theme for 2022) go hand in hand. I leave you with a final quote from Dr. King to inspire you this week: 

“We have learned to fly the air like birds and swim the sea like fish, but we have not learned the simple art of living together as brothers. Our abundance has brought us neither peace of mind nor serenity of spirit.”

A Wealthy Girl Corner

I want to remind you of the important role that men play in our wealth. As you desire to be (or surround yourself with) wealthy girls, please remember to continue to support the men in your life and get them to support you in the ways that you need. If you want more detail on how you can incorporate the men in your life, please read or re-read the “Being A Girl” chapter in A Wealthy Girl.