A Broken System: 'The End of Babies'

December is here, and you know what that means – 31 days left in 2019. Gulp! We have been journeying together this year around the theme of embracing change. Remember, it is change (or the coming of change) that forces us to re-evaluate whether we are setting up ourselves well financially, taking advantage of opportunity, or preparing properly for the unexpected.

Before the year is over, I want to hear from you on the ways in which you have personally embraced change, and how your actions have unlocked your ability to pursue wealth. I know others will benefit from your story, and I want to recognize your accomplishments. If you feel that you have not been able to embrace change as you have desired, I want to hear from you too because I want to know what ways I can help you reach your goals in 2020. Let me know by leaving a comment below. I will also share my story before the year is out so that you will have some company.

One story about embracing change that I do want to share now is that of Anna Louis Sussman. I do not know Anna, but I recently was moved by her New York Times opinion piece – “The End of Babies.” I’ll sum up the lengthy article in a few sentences.

First, Anna believes that fertility is declining in Denmark (and in countries like the U.S.) because of a shift in values toward a more capitalistic and individualistic society. At its best, the new value-system “reflects better educational and career opportunities for women, increasing acceptance of the choice to be child-free, and rising standards of living.” At its worst, “it reflects a profound failure: of employers and governments to make parenting and work compatible; of our collective ability to solve the climate crisis so that children seem a rational prospect; of our increasingly unequal global economy. In these instances, having fewer children is less a choice than the poignant consequence of a set of unsavory circumstances.”

Second, Anna calculates that she should have $200,000 saved before having a child. Right after, she also admits that “it is that the very notion of attaching a dollar figure to an experience as momentous as parenthood is a sign of how much [her] mind-set has been warped by this system that leaves us each so very much on our own, able to avail ourselves of only what we can pay for.”

At the article’s core, Anna holds the tension that plays out because of our society’s shift in values. This hit home for me because Anna is indeed in embracing society’s change in values by taking actions into her own hands. But, I must ask – at what cost? Extremely high, and unattainable dollar costs (for most people). Fear. Anxiety. Deep disappointment if things do not transpire as we expect them to. When the costs are this high, I think we do owe it to ourselves to examine the systems and structures that make these costs so unbearable.

Here’s my approach - What if we each strive to live out the values that we hold so near and dear to our hearts and usurp the system. That is, we put our time and our money toward the people, experiences, and things that we so desperately yearn, and in doing so, re-make the system under our own conditions. And as Anna suggests, we rely more on our interdependence, helping each other achieve what our individualistic systems fail to accomplish.  

I’m sure I’ve given you enough to chew on for the week. If you have a comment or thought, please leave a comment below

Before I go, I thought you’d enjoy these articles: